Facing My Giants.

i wasn't planning on going to the weekly d-group (i haven't been attending anyway since the Christmas Party back in 2006). but because of recent events and since i was already on the phone with D friday night, i decided to drop by.

D was going to show a movie, so i thought it wouldn't hurt to visit, plus i wanted to see if G will show up like she said she would. so i went, and watched. and had the most amazing experience ever. ok, so i've come across movies in my lifetime that had somehow-somewhat the same wow effect, but let me tell you, watching "Facing the Giants" (Sony Pictures) really was an experience in itself. i am not really a sports movie nut. sure, i enjoy sports-themed movies, but Facing the Giants isn't just about football. let me tell you, the rush of emotions was just overwhelming -- i didn't know whether to shout for joy or to cry. this is a great movie! so great, i went out and bought the DVD from odyssey the next day and watched it again last night.

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here are a couple of lines from the movie that had great impact on me:

When you accept defeat, that's what you'll get.

God will send the rain when He's ready; you'd better prepare your field to receive it.

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what are the giants in your life? do you deem them impossible to conquer? God knows how narrow the road i am in right now, but you know what? with God leading the way, tell me, what is impossible for Him?

NOTHING!

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i found out thursday night that a good friend (of mine and R's) has been cheating on his wife for almost a year now. i was one of the few who thought so highly of him, and now this. :( this man was on a pedestal, for tokwa's sake! out of all of R's good friends, he'd be the last person i'd ever think of as a cheating, good-for-nothing, soab... grrrrr.... (ok, calm down, K), but alas, he's been seeing a girl he met from his uh... far country, and has been seeing her here in manila behind his wife's back. so in a series of texts, i tell him that I KNOW. heck, i've been running to him for help and advice and now i found out that he hasn't been helping me out with my situation because he'd be a hypocrite to do so. the thing is, he was trying to squiggle his way out of my accusations, texting me that he "loves his wife and kids". but that doesn't reverse his philandering ways now, does it? it irritates me that someone like him would resort to sin, even when he knows how painful it is to be sinned against. does that make sense? i mean, he knows my pain, and often hears about my pain because i call them up practically every week to tell them about my pain, and yet... here he is, risking it all.

"is it worth it?" i asked him.
"it depends." he replies.

golly, i soooooooooooo want to hit him on the head!

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over the weekend, i saw how much i've changed. God has given me so much to learn the past year. He kneaded me so i can rise. i have learned that the devil CANNOT steal my joy if i do not allow him to do so. i've learned to face my giants head-on. situations come and go and now i know the purpose for each hurtful experience. i am wiser, and a lot stronger. i can stare adversity in the eye and say "ha, my God is bigger than you." it took a while for me to get here. it took a long while, actually. this morning, as i stood in front of our promo girls, i didn't blink when i told them my life is worth a 3-season (maybe 4 or 5) blockbuster teleserye. i don't mind. my life and everything that happened (painful, harrowing, scary et al) was worth it all. i don't mind being the little David that i am, knowing that all the Goliaths of the world will eventually fall.

"The army fighting for me is GREATER than the army fighting against me." i am elated that the Lord is on my side. because, NOTHING is impossible for the Lord.