Happy Birthday, Poohbear!

*sniff* A year went by so fast. Too fast. The baby is now officially a year old. *sigh* How I love him so. :)

Realizations

Today, as I sat in the movie theater at Rockwell waiting for Planet 51 to start, I found my thoughts drifting off to thoughts I've pushed aside. Call it denial, but I found it was easier to pretend than deal with issues head on.

The truth is, I am tired of wearing the mask I put on every day. But today, as I sat there, I realized that... I am okay. My good friend T, wrote a note on FB today that said so much about how important it is to belong to circles where friends accept you for who and what you are, where you don't need to pretend to be who you aren't. Simply because, well, there are people around you who value you as you are, flaws and all. If there are a handful who don't, then it's their problem, not yours.

I belong to a family of different strokes, but does it matter that we are different? That's what makes us special!

So today, I realized a lot of things. One of them being it is okay to be in my shoes. Besides, they are big shoes to fill. Not everyone can live my life. I mean, go ahead and try. Moreover, I realized that it is okay to be living the life I have. It is okay even if things aren't perfect. It is the imperfections that polish us - that mold us into beings we are set out to be. The trials, the circumstances are what prepare us for the end of the road.

As I type this, I realize that it is sad how some people cannot accept the facts the way they are. That some people prefer to make issues out of plain things. That circumstances are made to appear bigger than what they really are. And it is doubly sad that some people cannot see the beauty of transparency. That a lot of people in this world prefer to be with those who don't know the real 'you'. If you have to build up yourself to make yourself acceptable, then where is your real value? How sad is that?

So it does not matter that my marriage isn't perfect. That my family is not intact. No one can judge me for that. Circumstances brought me here. It is the way I deal with the circumstances, the way I carry myself in spite of the circumstances that matter. No, it doesn't mean I should wear the mask and pretend I am better than it. It means, even if I falter and cry, get angry and frustrated, freak out and break down, or even if I choose to just laugh it off...

I am okay.

Binatog

I've been having this incessant craving for Binatog lately. Yes, I go all the way to Tiendesitas just to get myself a bowl. It is so much a craving that I have been pestering friends and officemates for the recipe, to no avail. I've learned that Binatog is a dying delicacy, and the original recipe is lost to the 'thunders' generation of this world. Nyar.

Do you know how to make Binatog? I like it with grated coconut, sugar and condensed milk. My friend S likes it with salt. My obsession with it led me to pry and actually ask the man selling it where they get the boiled white corn. "May supplier po kami," he politely replied. "So Manong, how do you make it?"

"Secret!" He says with a smile.

Ah! Binatog! Why are you so addicting? My craving for Binatog is reminiscent of the Brazo de Mercedes addiction I had a few weeks back. Grrrr.

Must.Stop.Eating.Junk.

Blog Holiday

Yes, I was on a blog holiday. I had too much to do, and so little time. My friends and I are setting up a new biz - that's in between everything else on my list of things to do. And the clincher to my past two weeks is... my nanny, who only officially found out she was pregnant on November 1, gave birth (yes! gave birth, as in full-term gave birth!) to her second-born last Sunday!!! That's 5 days after her first-born's first birthday. Talk about fast. So yes, I am still in a daze. I guess it's a good thing she went on her day-off Saturday afternoon, or I'd be freaking out figuring out what to do.

Our baby will be a year old (yes, my nanny and I were pregnant at the same time last year) in a few days. I can't believe how fast time flies! We won't have a party this year, but a joint party some time next year when A turns 8. Hard times call for practical measures, besides, I'd be inviting the same group of friends.

I have a busy week ahead, with two events to cap the week. I have no idea how I'll survive. So many things have happened in the weeks that passed, with an old fuddy trying to get his way in my life. (Excuse me, I am NOT your daughter!) And sad stories about how old friends have made me the choice topic for their reunions, talking about something that happened 18 years ago! My goodness! Some people have to learn how to move on! But at least now I know who my real friends are. ;)

I don't know when I'll be back to my regular blog sched. But I have a Christmas raffle in store for you guys.

In the meantime, There are 24 DAYS BEFORE CHRISTMAS! Are you done with your Christmas Shopping? I am halfway through my list. :P Nyar.