this thought is swirling in my head.
~~~
right now, the events of last week has finally sunk in. i had to down two Panadols (extra strength!) last night just to get my head right. so much for the headache, what about the heartache?
i have been contemplating game plans for the past 24 hours. my constant question to J is "what should i do?" and of course she doesn't give me a decent reply. she doesn't know either.
with the much-dreaded friday looming, i am praying for wisdom. i keep telling myself "c'mon, Kaye. this is nothing compared to all the other things you know." but that's just it. i have learned and am still learning to forgive all of them, and it is easier to do so with the rest of them, because they were deceived into it all. i remember texting T how i wanted to tell her a zillion things when i saw her in Gloria Jean's and in 7-11, but decided that if i was gonna forgive her, i had to do that right then and there. so i texted her and forgave her (i didn't get a reply, but i wanted to let go of 6+ years of torment!). even if she didn't deserve it. even if she didn't seem to want it. no, i do not wish to carry all the bitterness. i don't want foes. my pain shouldn't stop me from showing God's love to all these women... even if they do not deserve it, from me, of all people.
thought balloon: how is it that God chose to bless me with such a colorful life?
because of last week's events, i am faced with a choice - one that is eating me up. sigh. yes, i have never felt this way before. i am feeling very vindictive (dugz, your word for the day). you can choose to hurt me, but once you cross the line and hurt my daughter, it's a different story altogether. every time i am tempted to give up and fly off to far, far away, i think about my daughter and what this would do to her. as a mother, i am crushed, and i know it is of no question whether to stay or go. of course i want a family for my daughter. that is why i cannot understand how this person chose to shut out that fact, given that we live in such a small, small world. yes (and i know you read my blog), i don't understand. i am angry and if i had my way, i'd slap you right across studio one on friday. but i won't have my way, and I AM NOT LIKE YOU. i will not choose to destroy your family, even if you attempted to destroy mine.
no, families are not meant to be broken. even if it seems like the best solution is to leave everything behind, pack up, and start a new life. it's just sad that it has come to this. that people's concept of sin has been rationalized to justify sin. Pastor Chinkee's message yesterday was perfect! you can attempt to rationalize adultery to just about anything: affairs, one night stands, patikim lang, accidents, etc. etc. but that does not negate the fact that what you did is a sin. thing is, you must face your consequences head-on. you cannot shy away from the fact that you chose to sin. but i will not be the one to judge you for your reasons. i won't be able to understand anyway. just stay away from my family and attend to yours.
Monday, March 10, 2008
Saturday, March 8, 2008
Struggling with Forgiveness.
It is almost 6pm, and I have been trying to finish the business plan for a principal all day. But my mind is elsewhere. I hate it when this happens.
As I've mentioned yesterday, there are a zillion things going on, and my mind is spinning with thoughts of what-ifs. Yes, this is not me. I am more on acting on my troubles. I don't sit quietly and wait. But God is telling me to wait. Sadly, my tongue is faster than a speeding bullet (SuperTongue!). Nyar.
So today, I sit here struggling. How can I wait on the Lord when my insides are screaming and my head feels like it is about to explode? Grabe - that is all i can say right now. For 6 years, I have been faced with similar troubles, and with each pain, I struggled with forgiveness. Pastor D, when talking about forgiveness two Sunday services ago, pointed out that when one forgives, he or she must learn not to be historical. Forgiveness entails forgetting it ever happened. Heck, I don't even know where and how to begin. The first time I ever had to deal with anything, I struggled with the thought for two whole years. And I only started to forget about the pain that incident caused me because it was replaced by something even bigger! I'm sorry, Pastor D, but when you mentioned it in your message, I wanted to raise my hand and say "but wives are only historical when history repeats itself!"
And you know what, each time I am faced with a new, yet similar situation, I am reminded of each situation in the past. How, oh how, in the world will I act, think and speak as if it never happened? When I attended Tita T's wake back in November, I met up with L who asked about R. R was still in the US that time. I told her about how I know the devil will not sit on this opportunity to attack our family (as he's done so several times in the past) and that I know all I can really do is pray. She reminded me about my prayer several years ago when I decided to change my perspective on R's life - pray for a forgiving heart.
And since then, I've been asking the Lord for just that... for the grace to show him unconditional and agape love - one that surpasses all understanding. But there are times when I sit there thinking about all that he has done and I find myself with no more love and forgiveness to give. :( But amidst all the anger and pain, I cannot find it in my heart to seek revenge. I have been accused of many, many things. I have been accused of destroying his reputation, of telling my daughter that she has a bad father, of creating Friendster accounts to malign him, of texting his friends about his evil ways, etc. Yes, many things. But you, reader of my blog, know very well how much I love him, how I'd fight for my family, and even how I admit my husband is the better parent! How can someone seeking to protect her family, destroy it by planting evil into it's very core?
I've learned a great deal of things this week - issues I cannot seem to let go of. It has shattered my impression of R and a number of people he's dealt with in the past and present. I cannot even begin to understand why. And it hasn't all sunk in. But my insides are screaming. And screaming. And screaming. Yes, I am struggling with forgiveness. This time, it is doubly hard. For the past two days, I've tried avoiding him. I've stopped talking to him, hugging him, calling him, etc - even when God has prodded me to show him unconditional love.
You know how your kids disobey and yet, even when you want to get mad for the rest of your life, you just can't? Well, it's the same with R. I just can't. I now see him through my Father's eyes... Okay, I am trying to see him that way. I know I have to forgive him and I do. But I can't say I completely have, because I am still struggling with the thought of it all. No, I don't know where to begin. So i read through my blogs, and I read through the emails I sent him when he was in the US. Because i needed to re-learn how to let go and let God.
So the other night, I listed down Ways on How to Wait Patiently on the Lord. I came up with twelve.
1. BE QUIET AND GENTLE. (1 Peter 3:1-4) *struggle* I can't even hold my tongue! Today, as he left for the gym, I kept muttering "Ang kapal nya a! Grabe! Grabe!"
2. DEFEAT THE DEVIL BY PRAISING GOD IN ALL THINGS - IN ALL SITUATIONS. My father once told me that the devil wants to see if we will still cleave to the Lord even when our situations seem bleak. So you defeat the devil by praising God in spite of your situation.
3. RESIST THE TEMPTATION TO NAG, LECTURE, TALK ABOUT PAST HURTS, ETC. *struggle* Like I said, I am not only historical when history repeats itself. Sometimes, I even get hysterical. :P
4. PRAY! (James 5:16) Need I tell you how prayer can move mountains? Also, the other night I realized that each time I prayed, I prayed about R. I realized that my prayer time became all about R and no longer about God and me. The events in my life are also about my relationship with the Lord, so I quickly had to acknowledge that and changed the contents of my prayers.
5. KNOW THAT GOD IS AT WORK EVEN WHEN WE DO NOT SEE IT. Funny thing happened a few weeks ago. I was struggling with a revelation (something I've been praying for for weeks but have not seen results to) so I confronted R about it only to find out that God has already taken care of the situation. Napahiya tuloy ako.
6. READ THE BIBLE AND EQUIP SELF WITH THE POWER OF GOD'S WORD. PUT ON THE ARMOR OF GOD. (Deuteronomy 17:19) See, I even found a verse to go with this. Thanks to my daily quiet time, hehe.
7. LOVE UNCONDITIONALLY. SHOW GOD'S AGAPE LOVE. (Romans 5:8) I was just telling S on Wednesday night... "God forgives us each time we fall short, I want to do the same thing for R." Amazing love.
8. FORGIVE. 24/7. Yea, yea... the non-historical, non-hysterical kind.
9. WWJD. ALWAYS THINK ABOUT WHAT JESUS WILL DO IN THE SAME SITUATION... THEN DO THAT.
10. TRUST IN GOD AND SEE THAT VICTORY IS NEAR! Back in 2004, when R and I started having difficulties, I'd stand on our balcony and swear on giving up. But fancy how Cityland Mega Plaza would always be in view, with Cityland's signature "IN GOD WE TRUST" motto shouting reminders at me - telling me to put my trust in God, not in men.
11. DO NOT TAKE THINGS INTO YOUR OWN HANDS. THE LORD IS AT WORK. *struggle* Like I said, I am not the type who'd sit around and mope. I want action. In fact, if I didn't want to do things God's way right now, I'd call someone right now to give her a good piece of my mind. Ha! But God is steering my ship.
12. DON'T LOSE COURAGE OR BE AFRAID. THE LORD IS FIGHTING FOR YOU! (Deuteronomy 20:3-4) Yes, with God as Commander-in-Chief, great is the army fighting for me!
I've often wondered why I have to go through so many troubles. The answer came a few months ago when a friend started going through similar pain. Then a few weeks ago, I got a message from an old acquaintance asking for counselling on her marriage. God is using me to reach out to others and to show them His love. I am comforted by this and even encouraged to know that others are looking to me for strength and answers.
Yes, yes... amazing grace and comfort has come my way - enough to sustain me and give strength enough for each day. I am not Wonderwoman or Supergirl, and I am still struggling with my own pain and how to truly forgive, but the decision to stay and wait on the Lord is FINAL. I will not give up. When any outsider sees how evil has taken over and how ugly this whole thing has become, they'd easily push for divorce or separation. But God is very clear (yes, S, he is!) when He says He HATES divorce. I will do this for God. So in my struggle, let Him be glorified. In my pain, let the devil be defeated with praise. J was right when she told S that I wasn't expecting my rewards on earth. I just want my family to experience God's limitless, unconditional love. That is the legacy I want to leave behind. That is the legacy I choose to leave behind. I am being pruned by the Lord, but at least I will learn the lesson of forgiveness well.
2 Corinthians 1:3-4
Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ. God is the Father who is full of mercy and all comfort. He comforts us every time we have trouble, so when others have trouble, we can comfort them with the same comfort God gives us.
As I've mentioned yesterday, there are a zillion things going on, and my mind is spinning with thoughts of what-ifs. Yes, this is not me. I am more on acting on my troubles. I don't sit quietly and wait. But God is telling me to wait. Sadly, my tongue is faster than a speeding bullet (SuperTongue!). Nyar.
So today, I sit here struggling. How can I wait on the Lord when my insides are screaming and my head feels like it is about to explode? Grabe - that is all i can say right now. For 6 years, I have been faced with similar troubles, and with each pain, I struggled with forgiveness. Pastor D, when talking about forgiveness two Sunday services ago, pointed out that when one forgives, he or she must learn not to be historical. Forgiveness entails forgetting it ever happened. Heck, I don't even know where and how to begin. The first time I ever had to deal with anything, I struggled with the thought for two whole years. And I only started to forget about the pain that incident caused me because it was replaced by something even bigger! I'm sorry, Pastor D, but when you mentioned it in your message, I wanted to raise my hand and say "but wives are only historical when history repeats itself!"
And you know what, each time I am faced with a new, yet similar situation, I am reminded of each situation in the past. How, oh how, in the world will I act, think and speak as if it never happened? When I attended Tita T's wake back in November, I met up with L who asked about R. R was still in the US that time. I told her about how I know the devil will not sit on this opportunity to attack our family (as he's done so several times in the past) and that I know all I can really do is pray. She reminded me about my prayer several years ago when I decided to change my perspective on R's life - pray for a forgiving heart.
And since then, I've been asking the Lord for just that... for the grace to show him unconditional and agape love - one that surpasses all understanding. But there are times when I sit there thinking about all that he has done and I find myself with no more love and forgiveness to give. :( But amidst all the anger and pain, I cannot find it in my heart to seek revenge. I have been accused of many, many things. I have been accused of destroying his reputation, of telling my daughter that she has a bad father, of creating Friendster accounts to malign him, of texting his friends about his evil ways, etc. Yes, many things. But you, reader of my blog, know very well how much I love him, how I'd fight for my family, and even how I admit my husband is the better parent! How can someone seeking to protect her family, destroy it by planting evil into it's very core?
I've learned a great deal of things this week - issues I cannot seem to let go of. It has shattered my impression of R and a number of people he's dealt with in the past and present. I cannot even begin to understand why. And it hasn't all sunk in. But my insides are screaming. And screaming. And screaming. Yes, I am struggling with forgiveness. This time, it is doubly hard. For the past two days, I've tried avoiding him. I've stopped talking to him, hugging him, calling him, etc - even when God has prodded me to show him unconditional love.
You know how your kids disobey and yet, even when you want to get mad for the rest of your life, you just can't? Well, it's the same with R. I just can't. I now see him through my Father's eyes... Okay, I am trying to see him that way. I know I have to forgive him and I do. But I can't say I completely have, because I am still struggling with the thought of it all. No, I don't know where to begin. So i read through my blogs, and I read through the emails I sent him when he was in the US. Because i needed to re-learn how to let go and let God.
So the other night, I listed down Ways on How to Wait Patiently on the Lord. I came up with twelve.
1. BE QUIET AND GENTLE. (1 Peter 3:1-4) *struggle* I can't even hold my tongue! Today, as he left for the gym, I kept muttering "Ang kapal nya a! Grabe! Grabe!"
2. DEFEAT THE DEVIL BY PRAISING GOD IN ALL THINGS - IN ALL SITUATIONS. My father once told me that the devil wants to see if we will still cleave to the Lord even when our situations seem bleak. So you defeat the devil by praising God in spite of your situation.
3. RESIST THE TEMPTATION TO NAG, LECTURE, TALK ABOUT PAST HURTS, ETC. *struggle* Like I said, I am not only historical when history repeats itself. Sometimes, I even get hysterical. :P
4. PRAY! (James 5:16) Need I tell you how prayer can move mountains? Also, the other night I realized that each time I prayed, I prayed about R. I realized that my prayer time became all about R and no longer about God and me. The events in my life are also about my relationship with the Lord, so I quickly had to acknowledge that and changed the contents of my prayers.
5. KNOW THAT GOD IS AT WORK EVEN WHEN WE DO NOT SEE IT. Funny thing happened a few weeks ago. I was struggling with a revelation (something I've been praying for for weeks but have not seen results to) so I confronted R about it only to find out that God has already taken care of the situation. Napahiya tuloy ako.
6. READ THE BIBLE AND EQUIP SELF WITH THE POWER OF GOD'S WORD. PUT ON THE ARMOR OF GOD. (Deuteronomy 17:19) See, I even found a verse to go with this. Thanks to my daily quiet time, hehe.
7. LOVE UNCONDITIONALLY. SHOW GOD'S AGAPE LOVE. (Romans 5:8) I was just telling S on Wednesday night... "God forgives us each time we fall short, I want to do the same thing for R." Amazing love.
8. FORGIVE. 24/7. Yea, yea... the non-historical, non-hysterical kind.
9. WWJD. ALWAYS THINK ABOUT WHAT JESUS WILL DO IN THE SAME SITUATION... THEN DO THAT.
10. TRUST IN GOD AND SEE THAT VICTORY IS NEAR! Back in 2004, when R and I started having difficulties, I'd stand on our balcony and swear on giving up. But fancy how Cityland Mega Plaza would always be in view, with Cityland's signature "IN GOD WE TRUST" motto shouting reminders at me - telling me to put my trust in God, not in men.
11. DO NOT TAKE THINGS INTO YOUR OWN HANDS. THE LORD IS AT WORK. *struggle* Like I said, I am not the type who'd sit around and mope. I want action. In fact, if I didn't want to do things God's way right now, I'd call someone right now to give her a good piece of my mind. Ha! But God is steering my ship.
12. DON'T LOSE COURAGE OR BE AFRAID. THE LORD IS FIGHTING FOR YOU! (Deuteronomy 20:3-4) Yes, with God as Commander-in-Chief, great is the army fighting for me!
I've often wondered why I have to go through so many troubles. The answer came a few months ago when a friend started going through similar pain. Then a few weeks ago, I got a message from an old acquaintance asking for counselling on her marriage. God is using me to reach out to others and to show them His love. I am comforted by this and even encouraged to know that others are looking to me for strength and answers.
Yes, yes... amazing grace and comfort has come my way - enough to sustain me and give strength enough for each day. I am not Wonderwoman or Supergirl, and I am still struggling with my own pain and how to truly forgive, but the decision to stay and wait on the Lord is FINAL. I will not give up. When any outsider sees how evil has taken over and how ugly this whole thing has become, they'd easily push for divorce or separation. But God is very clear (yes, S, he is!) when He says He HATES divorce. I will do this for God. So in my struggle, let Him be glorified. In my pain, let the devil be defeated with praise. J was right when she told S that I wasn't expecting my rewards on earth. I just want my family to experience God's limitless, unconditional love. That is the legacy I want to leave behind. That is the legacy I choose to leave behind. I am being pruned by the Lord, but at least I will learn the lesson of forgiveness well.
2 Corinthians 1:3-4
Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ. God is the Father who is full of mercy and all comfort. He comforts us every time we have trouble, so when others have trouble, we can comfort them with the same comfort God gives us.
Friday, March 7, 2008
I Figured I'd Post Something. :P
ok, so i was on a holiblog. :P i have a lot of things going on (in my head, most especially) but today, i've decided to blog. :)
there are a few things i have decided to do. first off, i am gonna make my blog on Blogger visible once again. i was thinking about it, and i've come to realize that God will be glorified even more when more people hear or rather read about the great things He has done in my life. it will take a while to click on each blog to make it public, but it will happen.
yesterday, i found out about a whole lot of things. things that i cannot even begin to comprehend. but God is great. He sent me comfort and peace. by the time i had my 3rd cry, i was feeling a wee bit on the cheerful side already. and now, i keep laughing it off. :P haay, J.
today, i have decided i will not dwell on what i've learned. instead, it will be as if i didn't know. it is better that way. can you just imagine the scandal? ha! God will deal with them. ang dami nila a. i am tempted to post pics and names and videos and what-nots, but God will fight for me. vengeance isn't mine.
and when next friday comes along... ayayay... so help me God.
ps. so you... yes you, reader of my blog... anonymous stalkers (both in the US and in Manila)... BEWARE. great is the Lord who leads the army fighting for me. i will not be moved.
there are a few things i have decided to do. first off, i am gonna make my blog on Blogger visible once again. i was thinking about it, and i've come to realize that God will be glorified even more when more people hear or rather read about the great things He has done in my life. it will take a while to click on each blog to make it public, but it will happen.
yesterday, i found out about a whole lot of things. things that i cannot even begin to comprehend. but God is great. He sent me comfort and peace. by the time i had my 3rd cry, i was feeling a wee bit on the cheerful side already. and now, i keep laughing it off. :P haay, J.
today, i have decided i will not dwell on what i've learned. instead, it will be as if i didn't know. it is better that way. can you just imagine the scandal? ha! God will deal with them. ang dami nila a. i am tempted to post pics and names and videos and what-nots, but God will fight for me. vengeance isn't mine.
and when next friday comes along... ayayay... so help me God.
ps. so you... yes you, reader of my blog... anonymous stalkers (both in the US and in Manila)... BEWARE. great is the Lord who leads the army fighting for me. i will not be moved.
Monday, January 7, 2008
Facing My Giants.
i wasn't planning on going to the weekly d-group (i haven't been attending anyway since the Christmas Party back in 2006). but because of recent events and since i was already on the phone with D friday night, i decided to drop by.
D was going to show a movie, so i thought it wouldn't hurt to visit, plus i wanted to see if G will show up like she said she would. so i went, and watched. and had the most amazing experience ever. ok, so i've come across movies in my lifetime that had somehow-somewhat the same wow effect, but let me tell you, watching "Facing the Giants" (Sony Pictures) really was an experience in itself. i am not really a sports movie nut. sure, i enjoy sports-themed movies, but Facing the Giants isn't just about football. let me tell you, the rush of emotions was just overwhelming -- i didn't know whether to shout for joy or to cry. this is a great movie! so great, i went out and bought the DVD from odyssey the next day and watched it again last night.
~~~
here are a couple of lines from the movie that had great impact on me:
When you accept defeat, that's what you'll get.
God will send the rain when He's ready; you'd better prepare your field to receive it.
~~~
what are the giants in your life? do you deem them impossible to conquer? God knows how narrow the road i am in right now, but you know what? with God leading the way, tell me, what is impossible for Him?
NOTHING!
~~~
i found out thursday night that a good friend (of mine and R's) has been cheating on his wife for almost a year now. i was one of the few who thought so highly of him, and now this. :( this man was on a pedestal, for tokwa's sake! out of all of R's good friends, he'd be the last person i'd ever think of as a cheating, good-for-nothing, soab... grrrrr.... (ok, calm down, K), but alas, he's been seeing a girl he met from his uh... far country, and has been seeing her here in manila behind his wife's back. so in a series of texts, i tell him that I KNOW. heck, i've been running to him for help and advice and now i found out that he hasn't been helping me out with my situation because he'd be a hypocrite to do so. the thing is, he was trying to squiggle his way out of my accusations, texting me that he "loves his wife and kids". but that doesn't reverse his philandering ways now, does it? it irritates me that someone like him would resort to sin, even when he knows how painful it is to be sinned against. does that make sense? i mean, he knows my pain, and often hears about my pain because i call them up practically every week to tell them about my pain, and yet... here he is, risking it all.
"is it worth it?" i asked him.
"it depends." he replies.
golly, i soooooooooooo want to hit him on the head!
~~~
over the weekend, i saw how much i've changed. God has given me so much to learn the past year. He kneaded me so i can rise. i have learned that the devil CANNOT steal my joy if i do not allow him to do so. i've learned to face my giants head-on. situations come and go and now i know the purpose for each hurtful experience. i am wiser, and a lot stronger. i can stare adversity in the eye and say "ha, my God is bigger than you." it took a while for me to get here. it took a long while, actually. this morning, as i stood in front of our promo girls, i didn't blink when i told them my life is worth a 3-season (maybe 4 or 5) blockbuster teleserye. i don't mind. my life and everything that happened (painful, harrowing, scary et al) was worth it all. i don't mind being the little David that i am, knowing that all the Goliaths of the world will eventually fall.
"The army fighting for me is GREATER than the army fighting against me." i am elated that the Lord is on my side. because, NOTHING is impossible for the Lord.
D was going to show a movie, so i thought it wouldn't hurt to visit, plus i wanted to see if G will show up like she said she would. so i went, and watched. and had the most amazing experience ever. ok, so i've come across movies in my lifetime that had somehow-somewhat the same wow effect, but let me tell you, watching "Facing the Giants" (Sony Pictures) really was an experience in itself. i am not really a sports movie nut. sure, i enjoy sports-themed movies, but Facing the Giants isn't just about football. let me tell you, the rush of emotions was just overwhelming -- i didn't know whether to shout for joy or to cry. this is a great movie! so great, i went out and bought the DVD from odyssey the next day and watched it again last night.
~~~
here are a couple of lines from the movie that had great impact on me:
When you accept defeat, that's what you'll get.
God will send the rain when He's ready; you'd better prepare your field to receive it.
~~~
what are the giants in your life? do you deem them impossible to conquer? God knows how narrow the road i am in right now, but you know what? with God leading the way, tell me, what is impossible for Him?
NOTHING!
~~~
i found out thursday night that a good friend (of mine and R's) has been cheating on his wife for almost a year now. i was one of the few who thought so highly of him, and now this. :( this man was on a pedestal, for tokwa's sake! out of all of R's good friends, he'd be the last person i'd ever think of as a cheating, good-for-nothing, soab... grrrrr.... (ok, calm down, K), but alas, he's been seeing a girl he met from his uh... far country, and has been seeing her here in manila behind his wife's back. so in a series of texts, i tell him that I KNOW. heck, i've been running to him for help and advice and now i found out that he hasn't been helping me out with my situation because he'd be a hypocrite to do so. the thing is, he was trying to squiggle his way out of my accusations, texting me that he "loves his wife and kids". but that doesn't reverse his philandering ways now, does it? it irritates me that someone like him would resort to sin, even when he knows how painful it is to be sinned against. does that make sense? i mean, he knows my pain, and often hears about my pain because i call them up practically every week to tell them about my pain, and yet... here he is, risking it all.
"is it worth it?" i asked him.
"it depends." he replies.
golly, i soooooooooooo want to hit him on the head!
~~~
over the weekend, i saw how much i've changed. God has given me so much to learn the past year. He kneaded me so i can rise. i have learned that the devil CANNOT steal my joy if i do not allow him to do so. i've learned to face my giants head-on. situations come and go and now i know the purpose for each hurtful experience. i am wiser, and a lot stronger. i can stare adversity in the eye and say "ha, my God is bigger than you." it took a while for me to get here. it took a long while, actually. this morning, as i stood in front of our promo girls, i didn't blink when i told them my life is worth a 3-season (maybe 4 or 5) blockbuster teleserye. i don't mind. my life and everything that happened (painful, harrowing, scary et al) was worth it all. i don't mind being the little David that i am, knowing that all the Goliaths of the world will eventually fall.
"The army fighting for me is GREATER than the army fighting against me." i am elated that the Lord is on my side. because, NOTHING is impossible for the Lord.
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