Thursday, September 17, 2009

I am so frustrated. I feel as if everything has spun out of control. My life's story has just gotten bigger. Nyar. It is now a 10-part teleserye. :P

But then, all that is happening to R is expected. No sin is left unhidden. Everything will eventually come out. Yep, all 'em skeletons in the closet. That is why, I am glad that I have Jesus in my life. Because it is through Christ that we have no condemnation! (Romans 8:1) Now, if only it works the same for man. Forgiveness is just so hard to do! And vengeance? Now that's another story. Man tends to take things into his own hands, seeking revenge when he should leave it all to God. Yes, so easy to say, so hard to do.

Many of you have written to say how strong I am. I am not strong. It is God who lives in me that is strong. In my weakness, He is strong. And His power is manifested in my weakness. This is all G-R-A-C-E. Awesome grace.

That is why I worry about R. He doesn't know how it is to depend on God. And in his own ability, he falls short. He cannot handle the stress; He breaks under pressure. I pray for God to reveal Himself to him during this time.

I didn't sleep a wink last night. I think I dozed off only to wake up shaking from a bad dream (yes, there are still things that are worse than the nightmare I've lived through, ha!).


The good news is... I finally got to see the baby after almost a week of being away. Alas, I must leave again tomorrow since the tour runs through Monday. All good, at least I can be with him at night. He took three steps on his own today. Must've been way excited to see me. :) I was told that he had a slight fever yesterday, and that his first tooth broke out. Aww... there goes that priceless toothless grin. :(

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