My best friend, F, is tying the knot this month. Yes, finally. After years of swimming in his fish bowl, he has decided to marry the one fish in it with him. Not that I do not agree. More like, I want him to be sure. Once, after I had tied the knot myself, F goes to me and says I married all for the wrong reasons. He could be right. I look back and I can only conclude that I may not be having the problems I have today had I waited for God's best. Oh well, c'est la vie. You make mistakes. We all do. Life is too short to dwell on past errors. We have to get up, move on, and make the most out of what is left of that once-upon-a-time dream.
And yet, let me just quote my earlier post as I find it so applicable to my point: Marriage is a lifetime commitment, and you must CHOOSE to see it through when you take that first step. When you say "yes" to your significant other, you say yes, knowing that he or she isn't perfect, believing that you will be able to stay married 'til death do you part.
So to you, F, I say if you found all the right reasons to do so, then "Cheers! and "Good luck!" I pray that yours work out. I know I've said it many times in the past, but I will say it again. If she makes you happy (and I know she will make you a good wife) then I'm all for it. You deserve to be happy. After all, everyone deserves a chance at happily-ever-after. And all good things come to those who wait, and we both know you've waited long enough. ;)
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6 months ago
K,
ReplyDeleteIt's easy to get disillusioned because of our own experience. But I have not yet turned into a skeptic with other people's relationships or marriages. The rising statistics of failed marriages should not be taken to mean that all marriages are alike.
There are marriages that work. Those that fail may have been broken to begin with, some may just not be aware of it.
I don't know which is worse:
To painfully let go of a husband who is not happy in the marriage? or to grin and bear the coldness of a marriage for the sake of the children (while the husband just keeps fooling around on the sly?)
Of course some marriages work. I just want F, in particular, to be sure he wants what he says he wants. Not because he just wants to try it out, given that there is a way to escape in the future, just in case. ;)
ReplyDeletek, pls dont be so bitter about marriages. no one gets married just because they want to try it out. especially not men. and i think no one also gets married thinking there is a way to escape in the future. people nowadays get married for the right reasons. few, maybe for convenience but i believe a lot more get married because of love. there is no tninking "just in case". please find it in your heart to be really happy and in your mind to be really positive. i admire your strength but sometimes you just so think cynically of things. maybe its because of what you've experienced. but i absolutely have no right to judge you. or anyone..
ReplyDeleteOf course a lot of couples still get married for love. I am not generalizing whatsoever. I am specifically referring to my best friend, who I hope has ironed out the differences that made him want to get out of the relationship sometime back. ;)
ReplyDeleteHey, I am really, really happy for you. I really am. Ok, postive vibes now. ;)
ReplyDelete